This post is extremely overdue.  It is only my second blog post, and I'm already slacking.

My second time approaching a stranger with the intent purpose of sharing the gospel was much more natural.  I allowed for a natural conversation to arise as my family and I walked through The Grove on a busy Friday evening.  We were standing at a special light fixture they had set up, when a woman standing beside me actually initiated a conversation.  She said her name was "K".  We talked about her work as an author and about her long distance relationship with her boyfriend.  Eventually I heard her say that she had once been a youth worker, and it was then that I found my "hook".

I asked her for more information regarding her time as a youth worker.  I asked if it had been religiously affiliated.  She said that it was.  So I asked if she was still attending church, and she mentioned that she had stopped some time ago.  We quickly moved on to different topics, and we eventually went back to talking about her boyfriend.  At the end of the conversation, we took a picture for her at the light fixture, and we promised to email it to her.  I said that we would add information about our church to the email, and that she should visit sometime.  Soon after we parted ways.

As Ryan and I talked about what had just happened, he stated solemnly, "Did you notice that she showed signs of bipolar disorder?"  I acknowledged that I too noticed the signs.  Her hair, dress, and makeup was disheveled, and her speech was rushed and jumped from topic to topic.  She was nice and friendly, but with bipolar disorder Ryan and I both knew that personalities and emotions can change drastically.

Considering the events of that evening, I find myself smacked in the face by a rush of concerns and some hard-to-swallow truths:
1) Am I ready to welcome and help a woman such as "K"?  Am I willing to step outside of my comfort zone?  Is my family ready?  Is Living Way ready?
2) Do I have even an ounce of love or sorrow for "K" or for the lost?  I'll admit that as I was speaking to "K", it was not with a genuine heart.  I simply wanted to meet the commitment I had made to share Christ with at least one person a week.
3) Acknowledging the fact that I do not have a true and honest heart for the lost, God won't you grant that heart in me?

As I mentioned at the very beginning, this post is way overdue.  I know that it was in part due to the fact that I was avoiding some ugly parts of my heart that I needed to work out.  I have also neglected to share Christ with the people I encounter.  There have been some opportunities where I know that I could have brought God into the conversation, but I have felt as if I shouldn't due to the lack of love in my heart.

But as I sit here and type, I'm reminded of my active years in ministry, particularly worship ministry.  When I first began singing at church as a youth, I'll admit I didn't go up there every Sunday and sing my heart out because I loved worshipping the Lord.  I enjoyed the spotlight, and the opportunity to sing on a microphone more than anything else.  It was not until years later that God truly changed my heart into that of a worshipper.  Perhaps in the same way, God will change my heart for the lost as I continue to practice sharing Him and the work of the gospel in my life to the people I encounter.

In the meantime, please lift up a simple prayer for me:
1) That I would not be discouraged, but would keep trying.
2) That God would change my heart for the lost.

It's a simple prayer list, but I think it is a good one.